Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Be Still My Soul

“Be still and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations I will be exalted in the earth.” - Psalms 46:10

The way we listen determines how we live. And the way we live determines how we are blessed. I am learning this day by day as Johnny and I travel on this journey through cancer to victory. The most important lesson, and the hardest one, is learning to “be still my soul” and to find the time to get quiet so I can hear God’s whispers to my heart.

In my last blog you will recall that I shared a moment of faith I had while listening to Johnny sleep. This was the night before his emergency blood test. Last Friday he had been tested and the results revealed extremely low blood counts. The nurse Toni from Mayo Clinic called and requested that we return the next day for a follow-up test to see if the counts were continuing down. She prepared us for the possibility of a blood platelet transfusion, if the numbers were still low. It might be a necessity before the next chemo session.

That night I forced myself to lay in bed and NOT fall asleep. I had an appointment with God that I wanted to keep. We had a few things to discuss and I wanted to step out in faith and try “walking on water.” I had recently spent time in prayer with Scarlett to help her dodge a few of Satan’s arrows he was slinging. I reminded her that the ole devil hits us with his best shot when we are on the brink of a breakthrough, to new levels in our faith and in our walk with Him.

Once again my own faith was confirmed by lighting someone else’s candle. As I lay there being still, I thought that I should take a “spoonful of medicine” that I just ministered to my daughter. If I believed everything I had just told her, if I believed that nothing was impossible with God, if I believed what Jesus said when He told his disciple that his heirs would do even greater miracles than He, as witnesses to His truth, if I believed that God indeed answers all prayer, if I believed that I truly trusted Him in all things, if I believed that healing was possible – then I had to walk through my hesitation of believing that I could pray over Johnny in the middle of the night and that his blood counts could be transformed instantly before the test in the morning.

So that night as I lay there I reached out my hand to touch him and declared him healed. As I did this I poured all the love in my heart out to him through my fingertips and I cast doubt out – just for a moment. Just like Peter, stepping out of the boat, my spirit soared above the water, and I walked on the ocean of love in my heart. I walked on the desire to believe with every beat of my heart that it was possible to transform my love into a power that surpassed all understanding. I wanted Johnny to be healed more than I wanted to breathe at the moment. I cried out in my spirit for God to catch him and hold him in His mighty arms. I asked him to take Johnny’s wounded body and make him whole.

For that twinkling of a moment I believed. And then, like Peter I gasped “Oh my! Is this possible what I am really doing?” Johnny stirred at that moment so I said “OK God, its in Your hands now.” Then I fell into a deep sleep and I’m sure I rocked the house snoring. Yes! By the grace of God I am human and lately often have to go sleep in another room so Johnny can sleep peacefully. But isn’t that what love is all about? Admitting our frailty and being loved despite ourselves?

So hallelujah! Fast forward to this morning. We had not heard anything from Mayo Clinic regarding our results. I reached the nurse today and we received THE ASTOUNDING news that Johnny’s blood count had inexplicably shot up overnight…hmmmmm… it what you will but I’m calling it a miracle! No blood transfusion necessary! Thank You Lord for your tender mercies!

So I come to each of you today and ask you to help us with another miracle. Tomorrow is Johnny’s next CAT SCAN to find the new results of what damage to the tumor and other sites has been done with treatments. We are praying to see progress with our weapons of mass destruction (prayer being the greatest weapon) combined with the chemotherapy. Will you please join us in prayer for miraculous results?

The test will be done tomorrow (Thursday) at 12:50pm EST. I ask you to join hearts with us tomorrow and send us all the love you can muster at the appointed time. Take our hands and walk together with us towards miracles in His name. Help us to abound in HOPE by the power of the Holy Spirit. By the mouth of two or three witnesses He has told us “EVERY WORD SHALL BE ESTABLISHED.” 2 Corinthians 13:1

So we ask you to join us as we decree Johnny’s healing – as we trust in the promises of the Lord – the Great Physician – to restore Johnny’s health. We also ask, not only for Johnny’s healing, but for all who are broken in heart, body or spirit – those we know and those who we do not know – those who struggle through their own circumstances that need healing – we ask that God will extend the same healing that we ask for ourselves – to all of those we pray for also. If He can do for one He can do for all.

We thank you ahead of time for your prayers and compassion and the miracles to come. And we thank the Lord our God for His amazing grace. AMEN!

Beautiful Blessings to you all,



Shannon Williams said...

Rene you gave me Godbumps all over! I will find a quiet place in nature and be there with you in Spirit tomorrow. Miracles do happen. One of my favorite quotes is "Teach only love, expect Miracles". You radiate love and I'm sure you can expect miracles. I certaintly do.

Scarlett Lillian said...

You make me cry everytime! :-)

Caroline Ghetes said...

Your husband must know that he is the luckiest man on earth to have a wife who prays for him as much as you do. You are such a remarkable woman and inspiration to me. Thank you for this posting. It was very moving, and touched me like I so needed to be touched today. I will make sure to pray for your husband and your family tomorrow during that testing. God bless you!

Stacy said...

What a beautiful post. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.

Anonymous said...

I will be in prayer for Johnny! I've got a little sticky note on my laptop and I will be praying! I prayed this morning on my way in to work and I will pray until we get a post on the MIRACLE that we are going to see today! Praise God for who He is and His amazing POWER!!!!!!!

Annie- Nashville

Jackie said...

I have not commented on yours or Scarlett's blog before although I've been a stalker. Tuesday night as I was thinking about how I could possibly do something for your family it came to me that I should submit Johnny's name to our prayer roll at the Ogden LDS Temple. I have a strong testimony of prayer, especially in the temples. That's the first place I go to for help for those I love. I also have prayed in your families behalf. It's interesting how this blog world can bring hearts together. I love how you are able to express your feelings using scripture.
Thanks for sharing!

Rebecca said...

Still praying!! How did it go?? xoxo

Rebecca said...

By the way, your entries are AMAZING and so encouraging and challenging. Thank you for pointing me to Jesus!! xo

jen harris said...

I just have to tell you how much I enjoyed spending Friday evening with you both. I told Scarlett that I felt like we just left my own parents' home. Thank you for the wonderful conversation and opening your home and hearts to me. I miss you all already!
xoxoxo, jen