Friday, March 5, 2010

The marathon I ran for my dad!

Wow, it's been almost a year since the last entry in this blog. And I still can't believe it's just over a year since my dad passed. I still see him in pictures around my home and it still feels like he's here, but that I haven't been over to my parents house to see him in a while. I was good about letting work and work travels consume my time, and it just feels like I've been too busy to go say hi and do dinner with him and mom on our old usual Friday night dinners. Then that moment passes, and I remember, wow, he really... is... gone.

On the 1-year anniversary of when he passed, I saw there was a marathon being held here in Jacksonville. It was a marathon for breast cancer that I had been wanting to run the past 2 years for my mom and grandmother, who are both survivors. But when I saw it fell on my dad's anniversary, I knew there was no way I couldn't not run it. I was barely a runner, but it was chasing something that felt impossible that I wanted to prove WAS possible. I knew no matter what amount of pain I went through in training and the day of was nothing compared to the pain my dad endured and fought courageously until the end.

It started with running for my family, and turned into a whole t-shirt full of names I collected on my own blog of loved ones they knew that had battled with cancer. It made the experience mean so much more knowing I was running for other people around the world.

The day before the race, I picked up my number bib, and was amazed to see that my number was 998... which used to be the beginning of my dad's first cell phone back in the day. I thought that was a strange coincidence... or an ace up God's sleeve to let me know my dad would be there running with me.

The day of the race I took my iPhone and recorded video of the experience and sights and sounds. I knew I would probably never run another marathon, and I wanted to remember it as something to show my kids one day of something I did for their grandfather.

Here's the video recap of the run! I invite you to watch it and run along with me!


Shari Collins said...

Dear Scarlett, I have watched the video several times. Anita and Becki watched it with me once. It was so moving. I am so proud of you!!!!
I just read your blog and I wanted to share with you something. Just my opinion. The reason sometimes you forget Johnny is gone is because he ISN'T gone. Part of him will be with you always. He's not DEAD! Children of God don't die. When our old body wears out here on earth, God just takes us to be with Him. Johnny is alive and well just as my Joshua is. The best way I have found to deal with Joshua not being with me, is to just pretend he is out at the farm or away working. When I think of him being down in the hole in Bryceville the pain is too big. It's too big because when God created us He didn't intend for us to ever die. That changed as you know when Adam and Eve had to leave the garden. But, seriously Scarlett, part of your Daddy is with you and always will be with you. Continue and press on with life as you have been doing. That's what Johnny wanted for you. If you are anything like me, sometimes I feel guily if I'm really happy and having a good time. I have to fight the feeling, that I must be sad forever since Joshua's body is not with our family now. My Joshua came to visit me after he left his body. It was just as great as the day I gave birth to him. I know he is okay. He is still so alive and so peaceful. The thing he stressed to me in his short visit was for me to STOP CRYING AND TO BE HAPPY!! It was hard but since I have made those changes my life has been different. Don't get me wrong. I still shed tears when I start to miss him. I did that when he would go out of town and work. Any time he was away I missed him. The difference now is I can cry but the pain isn't like is was before.
I didn't mean to preach a sermon to you.
I am SO VERY PROUD OF YOU!!! You are an inspiration to watch. God bless you.
In Christ Love,
Shari Collins

Laura Rauch said...

Wow, what an amazing gift!!!! I lost my Dad to cancer a few years ago and it is never the same without him around but I know that he is waiting for me in heaven! I actually replayed a message on my answering machine today that he left for me years ago.

I love your work, keep the good job! Maybe one day I can afford to attend your workshop!!
Blessings! - Laura